How to be happy - Part 2

In how to be happy part 1 we talked about the feelings that are holding us back from happiness. Today I want to focus on the things that really make you happy.

Dreams of your inner child

Do you remember when you were a child and you were happy? You had all these dreams and goals and nothing could stop you. When asked what you wanted to be you answered’

• a veterinarian
• an astronaut
• the president of the United States
• insert your dream career here

What happened to that child? Nothing could hold you back. Nothing stood in your way. You knew what made you happy and you did those things.

Some people might say we grew up. “The world isn’t all sunshine and lollipops.” Remember the first grumpy sad person that told you that? Their world wasn’t filled with sunshine and lollipops but instead of changing their own reality and following their dreams they decided to try and crush yours. If you are not happy, somewhere along your road in life you setup a roadblock to your happiness. Well no more roadblocks. Happiness is on the other side of those roadblocks so do everything possible (or what some people consider impossible) to overcome the obstacles in your path.

Important secrets of happy people

Do you know happy people that seem so happy that it is almost infectious? Well they have a few secrets for being happy that can help you. For these secrets to work, you must understand this,

You are not just here to fill space or be a background character in someone else’s movie. Consider this: nothing would be the same if you did not exist. Every place you have ever been and everyone you have ever spoken to would be different without you. We are all connected, and we are all affected by the decisions and even the existence of those around us. (link)

Happy people don’t spend all their time watching reality shows, they create their own reality. Ready for the important secret of happy people? Ok, here it is.

Happy people set goals and spend their time achieving those goals.

There other secrets of happy people but I believe this is the most important one.

Setting smart goals for happiness

What is it that really makes you happy? What puts the biggest smile on your face? When I asked myself this question my mind was filled to the brim with what I enjoy doing. I made a list so I could discover what my goals should be, what was standing in the way of those goals, and to give myself direction for achieving my happiness goals.

What makes me happy

• Being debt free and having emergency savings
• Hanging out with good friends and family
• Traveling, visiting new places, seeing new things, and meeting new people
• Doing my talk radio show
• Blogging because I want to instead of feeling like I have to
• Cooking and eating great healthy food

I took each item on the list to discover what was keeping me from achieving the things that make me happy.

Being debt free and having emergency savings

problem - 5 years ago I was laid off from one of my most favorite jobs. I had $15,000 in debt and without any income I had no way of keeping up with the payments let alone paying off the debt. Losing this job devastated me. I had no backup plan, no other job opportunities, and starting over at the bottom and working my way back to the salary I was making before I was laid off would take time that I didn’t have with all the bills piling up.

I got so mad when I was laid off that I pulled a Jerry Maguire and “FLIPPED OUT” and burnt any bridge that was still standing that would allow me to be rehired by the company that laid me off. Instead of realizing at the time that my personal financial situation (debt and having no savings) was the reason for my fear of being temporarily unemployed I took my frustrations out on the guy that laid me off, the HR girl, and the CEO of the company.

I fell into a deep depression and decided to go back to school so I could get a worthless degree that would allow me to apply for jobs that I could do but could not get hired doing because they only wanted to hire someone with a college degree. [another post for another day]

Fast forward to today. I make money from my websites and doing odd jobs now and then, but I do not make enough money to pay my bills. To be financially free and debt free I need to make some adjustments.

solution - Increase my income. I need a job where I make a steady paycheck. I make money doing what I love, blogging, but I don’t make enough yet to pay off $15,000 in debt and save up an emergency fund. Need to update my resume and start job hunting.

a note to the readers - If you know of a job that needs a highly motivated individual send me an email at my contact form.

Hanging out with good friends and family

problem - Several months ago what was my best friend of 15 years became someone I could no longer be around. He started lying to me and my family and he had become manipulative to the point of making statements like “if you don’t do X then your not my friend.” That was the last straw and I ended the friendship. He is still not in the position to have a best friend type relationship, he has personal issues that he needs to workout (counseling would be a great idea) before we can ever begin to rebuild our relationship.

I have several great friends through blogging, but none of them live close enough to me to hang out with in a face to face environment. Also my lack of money prevents me from being albe to even put gas in the car or going anywhere that costs money (movies, playing pool, etc…) I need a new best friend.

solution - I need to get out of the house and meet people. I need a job so that I can have some money for entertainment and I can buy my own tickets, drinks, and food if I am out with a friend.

I recently got an email from an old best friend that moved out of state that has recently moved back to the Oklahoma City area. I need to try and rebuild this friendship.

a note to the readers - If you need a friend, would like to hang out with a really interesting guy (that’s me Wild Bill) and live in the Oklahoma City metro area, send me an email using my contact form and we will get together and have some fun.

Traveling, visiting new places, seeing new things, and meeting new people

problem - The job I got laid off from involved a lot of traveling and I love traveling. I have next to no money to travel. I need a more income so I can set some money aside so I can travel. Also The cars we own can get us to places we need to go that are close to home but we need a more reliable car if I am going to be able to travel more.

solution - Need more income. Need a newer car in good working condition.

a note to the readers - If you need a job for a travel writer/blogger drop me a line and we might be able to hekp each other out.

Doing my talk radio show

problem - I used to do a talk radio show 3 times a week. The station was having financial problems so they shut down (hopefully temporarily) until they can raise more capital.

solution - I can podcast my own show. I’ll have to find a new way to take callers (I enjoy talking to callers). I can also findout more about what I need to do to start a career in terrestrial radio. I might need to go back to school or get more training to get a traditional radio job.

a note to the readers - If you need a job for a travel writer/blogger drop me a line and we might be able to hekp each other out.

Blogging because I want to instead of feeling like I have to

problem - I love blogging, however sometimes it feels more like a chore than a passion. I let my other problems get to me and by doing that I stopped doing the things I love to do like blogging.

solution - I need to start blogging again. Pick topics that are more enjoyable to write about (politics is so depressing right now avoid this topic at all cost.) I am in the process of doing complete blog makeovers on all my blogs.

PassionateAmerica.com needs a new focus. Passionate America was my first blog and I used to write about anything and everything that I was interested in at the time. Passionate America needs to focus on Passionate Positive News and Stories with Personality to increase your Happiness and I need to move some of the posts that do not deal with that focus to other blogs or delete those posts.

PassionateBlogger.com needs to focus on Helping Passionate Bloggers Make A Living Online with tips and advice to help new bloggers.

My newest blog (this one is a secret for now I’ll tell you about it later) needs more content and then needs to build traffic and a community of readers.

Cooking and eating great healthy food

problem - My family likes junk food and unhealthy fatty starchy foods. I love healthy foods so when I cook I try and split the difference and end up with food that makes me fat and food that my family doesn’t really like. I gave up eating the foods I enjoy for a while due to money, depression, and family pressure. I sat around eating bags of chips, bowls of cereal, and way to many soft drinks. I gained 30 lbs of fat, lost most of my muscle, and was to the point where it was either buy new clothes or go on a serious diet.

solution - Stop drinking soda. Let the family cook for themselves and I cook my own meals. I spent way to much time trying to get them to eat better food, if they don’t want to eat what I am cooking and eating then they can make their own food. Start working out again and building lean muscle mass.

a note to the readers - I started eating healthy and working out again about 2 months ago. So far I have went from 238lbs to 210lbs, lost a lot of body fat, gained about 15lbs of muscle, and now I fit in all of my cloths once again. Another 6 moths of working out and eating right and I might be able to get a job as an underwear model. Six pack here I come.

Make your own list of what makes you happy

My list above is what makes me happy you can use it as an example to make your own list of what makes you happy.

When you have your list make the changes in your life that will help you achieve your happiness goals. In How to be happy - Part 3 I explore celebrating goal achievements and staying on track.

For more about happiness check out these related posts.

How to be happy - Part 1

Make Time For Happiness - Series:

• Part 1 - Adding Happiness To Your To-Do List
• Part 2 - Taking Your Happiness To The Next Level - Decrease Interruptions
• Part 3 - Don’t Be Stingy! - Give Some Happiness To Increase Your Happiness
• Part 4 - How To Start Pursuing Your Happiness Today